she wears short skirts, i wear blue shirts, she’s cheer captain and damnit jim, i’m a doctor
(via misterchekov)
i think one day leonardo dicaprio should be the host that reads the nominees for best actor and when he opens the envelope to see who won it turns out his name is printed neatly in the center and he chokes up a little and his eyes water and his cohost takes the card and exclaims LEONARDO DICAPRIO!! and the audience cheers and leo cries and his supporting actors and actresses come up and hug him
i dont care if this goes against oscar tradition i just want leo to be happy
i’m not “cute” awkward.
i’m “what the hell is wrong with you” awkward.
(Source: thefugitivedimension, via jennstarkid)
today in yearbook this guy AJ was being really rude and disruptive so my teacher told him to act ladylike. instead of doing his usually disruptive stuff, every 30 seconds he would yell out
“MY BOOBS HURT”
“I NEED A MAN”
“IF YOU CANT HANDLE ME AT MY BEST YOU SURE AS HELL DONT DESERVE ME AT MY WORST”
“I CANT DRIVE”
“WHY DOES NOBODY LOVE ME”
(Source: drarna, via thebeardandiareone)
